Metformin Update and Life in General

So I have been on Metformin now for a little over a week. I am still currently taking 250mg at breakfast and again at dinner. I am 7 pounds down right now. I have fluctuated a pound back and forth the last couple days but I have not been as strict with eating as I was.  I had McDonalds chicken and fries yesterday and half a small piece of tiramisu (which is the first sweet I’ve eaten in three weeks).  I have found that when I have bread, that makes a difference, even if it is whole wheat or whole grain.   I have started taking the pill about five minutes before i start my meal. We read online it was better that way because it helped with fullness during the meal.  I am practicing portion control so, I’m not sure it’s helping so much in that way.

I have fallen a bit off the wagon in regards to diet soda.  I have had a few 20oz bottles in the last couple weeks.  It still tastes good even after a year of not drinking it. Ive also gone back to drinking Diet Arizona Green Tea that is made with Splenda.  Id rather have that then the diet soda honestly.  Moderation is the key. Keep on the water, which I have not been as good about either.  I have been walking a half a mile on my morning break and again in the afternoon with the girls I work with. I am wearing my fitbit and trying to get as close to 10K steps as I can each day. I don’t normally make it but I am in the 6-8K range most days.

This morning I put on a pair of hand me down pants from a friend that was a size 22. They fit! Ever so slightly snug across the lower tummy but no problems zipping. Now, in all fairness, they are made by Fashion Bug so i think their sizes ran big. So I probably haven’t truly gone down t a size yet. But, mentally its a bit encouraging and making me be more aware today.

Kids are off school now for summer break. First day home alone. They’ve called me three times already. LOL! I wish I had summers off with them.

As I’ve said a million times…I need to win the lottery.

Well…lunch time.

Ciao!

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Out the Window

Yesterday was a crazy day to say the least.  I was only scheduled to have half a day as my oldest had graduation from 8th grade.  I was scheduled to work with a client today on internship. And for those of you that don’t know, I work with clients that have mental health diagnosis of varying types and degrees.  One of these clients I had to end his internship due to several reasons. He wasn’t happy about it.  It’s a very long story I don’t want to rehash and can’t for legal reasons, but he was unhappy to the point that shortly after he left the building he went and found a large rock and threw it through the glass front door to my office building.  I was right around the corner and didn’t see who had done it..only came back around and saw the aftermath. However, the receptionist saw my client ducking away past the bushes just after the door was shattered.  They locked the building down as if there was a dangerous person within the premises.  I was freaking out a bit. I feel like it was my fault the client acted this way. Even though I have been repeatedly assured that it was not my fault, that I would not be fired..i still feel like i instigated the incident because I ended his internship which, though very minimal, paid a stipend check to him every week.  He was upset because he was “being fired” which is not the case.

Last night I had nightmares about him coming back with more volatile weapons other than large rocks to exact retribution.  My guy had to leave for work this morning at some ungodly hour of like 430 am to make a delivery two states away. (I really hate that about his job) so he wasn’t around to talk to this morning about all this and the dreams.

This morning I found out he was released with no charges pressed against him and I THINK he was just ticketed.  I am fearful he will come back onto the property and try something else or try to talk to us or get back into the building.  I know I have to understand its the type of population that I work with and stuff like this will happen from time to time, but this is my first incident and its a bit unnerving.

Someone told him he could apply for a job position that was open with my company. I’d say after this that opportunity or any with our company is, no pun intended, out the window.

Birds in the Sky, You know how I feel…

To quote Nina Simone, I’m feeling good.

I’ve been on the metformin now for four days and have had no side effects. I have cut out sugar almost entirely. I just still cant take coffee without a little bit of it. Call it my indulgence.   It was tough last night though. I had ladies over last night for crafting and one of them brought bing cherries and a pack of Lil’ Debbie Oatmeal Cream sandwiches.  I love those things and did not have one.  I made chicken skewers with peppers, onions and mushrooms. We ended up cooking them in the oven because we ran out of propane shortly after putting them on the grill.  I have been trying to make healthier choices this week. I have given up white bread, rice and potatoes (well 98% on the potatoes). I had a couple of steak fries off my guys plate the other day when we were out to lunch. I ate my burger with no bun. Trying to cut my red meat intake down some during the week and eat more chicken. Im going to look on Pinterest for more good chicken recipes.

I talked to a pharmacist last night about this medication and she told me to stay away from high sugar foods, which fruits are not a part of, thank goodness! I think I would go nuts without watermelon. I am finding it to be my new go to sweet food. My guy and I eat at least one a week. She also said white bread and white rice. Whole grains, whole wheat is ok in moderation. She was very nice and gave me more information then the guy at my normal pharmacy.

The next patch with flying comes out in World of Warcraft on Tuesday. So wish I could take the day off and play but I do have a half day thursday for kids stepping up ceremonies so Ill get my WoW on then. Ive already gotten the achievments required for the Draenor flying so its just working on the rep they require.  😀

The time has gotten away from me..ill have to come back and write more later.  Its crazy here at work.

Ciao for now!

“Don’t Look Back…You’re Not Going That Way”

So, today was a day for some big steps. First, I started a medication called Metformin to help me lose weight. I was on it in the past but I was not instructed properly on what to eat or not eat so I had bad reactions with side effects that put me off of taking it after two weeks.  Ten years later, I am giving it a try again. Being more careful this time…knowing what I can and can’t eat to avoid the dreaded G.I. issues.  One day taking half the dose and so far, no issues.  But, I am almost afraid to eat.  Probably being overly cautious. See how it goes after a week.

Today, I also took the wedding ring set from my marriage (now divorced obviously since I have such a great guy now) and finally took them to one of the local jewelry stores and sold them.  I was a little emotional about it but no tears at least.  It was a big step in letting go. I had originally thought about resetting the diamond but decided it was best to just part with it completely. I found out though that it was a rather poor quality diamond so I didn’t get as much as I liked. Is what it is. Its done and gone and was the last vestiges of my previous life (other than having to deal with him and our children).  The money I got will go in the savings account towards the down payment on our future house.  My guy was very concerned about me selling these items and the sentimental value to them because he said he is sure there were good times. I had passing thoughts of keeping the set for my son’s in case they wanted to use them to propose to their future spouse but then I figured they come from a broken marriage and the superstitious person in me doesnt want to give them the bad luck that I had in my marriage. So..its gone. The anniversary band is gone too. Also got rid of a gold necklace and bracelet set, a custom made silver charm I had made for the ex that he never liked and never wore. Also got rid of a pin he gave me as a handfasting gift before we were married. (medieval group pretend wedding token)  All gone. I have no more jewelry from him.  A new start.

Well…though it wasn’t a particularly hard day, the emotional turmoil of it has me wanting to turn in early.  More tomorrow when Im back in the office to the normal grind.

Cheers my friends.

Feeling naked..

Its really dumb actually. One of the stones in a ring I wear is loose after just coming from the jeweler to be sized. I thought they could fix it right then and there but BOTH jewelers decided to go to lunch at the same time so now they have to keep my ring to fix it.

I don’t know why but when Im not wearing my normal jewelery i wear every day, I feel naked without it. I tend to spin that ring on my finger with the other hand when I think or am nervous and now its not there.

Just a quirk i suppose.

Glutton…..for punishment

I am a good daughter. I have always been a good daughter, at least in my opinion. I didn’t cut classes or days from school. I didn’t drink or do drugs. I didn’t boost the family car for joy rides. I got fairly good grades. I didn’t get pregnant out of wedlock or in my teens. I didn’t get arrested for anything.  I was respectful and never cursed at my parents in anger (at least not to their face).  I always tried to be a role model for my younger sister even when she beat me up because I wouldn’t do the things she wanted me to that I knew were against my parent’s instructions. (yea i have scars in more than one place from our fights as kids)  I married my high school sweetheart and gave them two grandchildren (then got divorced..and dont think my father didnt give me a few rounds of “I told you so” over that relationship).

That being said, I have always butt heads with my mother.  My sister (now that we are older and get along famously) says its because I’m a lot like her. Ok i can see that we have the same temper, but as time has passed I realize I am not like her.  I take more after my father. I have his sense of humor, likes in hobbies, tv shows, etc.  Now, my parents fight all the damn time.  Dad is a home body and not a person to travel more than maybe an hour away to the local race track to watch nascar races. Mom..wants to travel the world and see it all. That is just one example. So, they butt heads all the time on so many topics. I believe, this is why we butt heads too.

So in the whole trying to be a good daughter thing, and the fact I live three and a half hours away from them, I give them a call on my morning drive to work to chat.  Past experience has led me to now do it maybe once a week.  And I am now questioning why I call at all.  I call up with the intention of hearing how they are doing. How my grandmother who had hip surgery is healing (she’s convalescing at their house), how my sister and her family is doing (she is moving her mother in law in with her…GAK!!! which is her opinion too), etc.  Instead, I get chastised about money and why dont i move back down near the family where I should be, why dont i call more often…oh look how much weight Ive lost since having my stomach cut down to the size of my thumb (and in-depth detail about the differences in size clothing that she wears compared to my sister, who also had the same surgery and their body shape differences……blah blah blah). It ends up turning into a bash me and my poor decisions chat or a look how fabulous I am cause being thin is the only thing in the world chat. Either way, I end up hanging up the phone in a lousy mood and regretting dialing the number to begin with. Everything turns around to her. As a friend jokingly said  “How are you? Lets talk about me! What do you think of me? Enough about me…let’s talk about me!!!”

Seriously…they were spot on. Yes, they’ve met my mother.  Most of my friends that have met my mother have the same opinion.  My guy, who is the biggest endorser of turn the other cheek and find the best in everyone is now of the same opinion as all of my friends. Its the one thing he and my ex husband commiserate and agree on (that is saying a lot too).

This morning it was about furniture that my sister gave me five years ago and wanted some back for the mother in law that was moving in because she is jobless and up to her eyes in debt due to credit cards and is about to lose her house, etc.  Im using said furniture so now i have to give it back and find something else to replace it. which started the argument with my mother this morning about how I have more money than I say and should just go buy new furniture.  That statement alone is a whole other entry along so not going into it. I am saving to buy a house so Im not making any large unnecessary purchases except car repairs or things like that.  She is of the mindset of  “I want it there for Im going to get it. Now. By any means possible even if it means putting myself in credit card debt”, which she has several times.

All this being said I will say that my mother has always provided for us as kids. We never wanted for anything. She was always there and a good mom. Its just as I’d gotten older and developed more as an adult and in my personality that all these things came about.  I lived with my parents for two years after my ex and I split and it was not the best of times. My decision to move out came after a horrific fight one night where she accused me of lying to her and I proved her wrong. She had to swallow her pride and apologize where in turn I said in six months when the kids were done school we would be moving out. And, six months to the day later, true to my word, we moved 3.5 hours away.  Best. Decision. I. Ever. Made.  I had to cancel my two year long planned birthday trip to Italy to do it (and trust me I have regrets to this day for that) but here I am. Happy and with two thriving kids that love where they live.

So I guess Im a glutton for punishment when I call them once a week to “catch up”.  They are family still after all. And while I love them dearly….I definitely love them much more with 300 miles between us.  Don’t judge me.

Kids!!!!

So my current embroidery project requires gold boullion. This is my first time really using it.  I purchased this packages many years ago but when I opened it last night..this is what I found. I believe sometime in the past years one of my children found it and thought it was fun to play with.  *SIGH*

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I am cutting out the usable sections. I am also very frustrated. Meh!